Devotion

My husband and I have been going through a book called 100 Prayers of thanksgiving (does not give a specific author).  We read this together usually at breakfast and we don't get it done everyday but have enjoyed them.

Today's really hit me as it fits my blog very well, I feel.  So I am going to share it with you.

Growing in Christ

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.  1 Corinthians 13:11 NKJV

     Norman Vincent Peale had the following advice for believers of all ages:  "Ask the God who made you to keep remaking you."  That advice, of course, is perfectly sound, but often ignored.

The journey toward spiritual maturity lasts a lifetime.  As Christians, we can and should continue to grow in the love and the knowledge of our Savior as long as we live.

When we cease to grow, either emotionally or spiritually, we do ourselves a profound disservice.  But, if we study God's Word, if we obey His commandments, and if we live in the center of His will, we will not be "stagnant" believers; we will, instead, be growing Christians... and that's exactly what God wants for our lives.

"With God, it isn't who you were that matters; it's who you are becoming."  Liz Curtis Higgs

"Every great company, every great brand, and every great career has been built in exactly the same way:  bit by bit, step by step, little by little."   John Maxwell

Today's Prayer

Dear Lord, I know that I still have so many things to learn.  I won't stop learning, I won't give up, and I won't stop growing.  Every day, I will do my best to become a little bit more like the person You intend for me to be.  Amen

I just really felt like this was one I needed to and wanted to share.  I know it really hit home with me.  Many have in this little book but I have been lazy about sharing.

Hope you enjoy this little tidbit for today.  

Thanks...

Thanks to Melanie for making me my One Word.  She has a wonderful blog http://www.onlyabreath.com/.  Here is what she made for me to put on my blog.

In Need of Sleep

WOW!!  Can't believe it has been almost a month since I last blogged.  I have been busy or lazy...let's go with busy, it sounds better.

I started a new job in July and I really love it.  Part-time, close to home, flexible & I am working as a Medical Assistant in Family Practice which I love .  So, Yes, I have been busy adjusting and working. 

I am working to get a balance between home & work but that seems to take some time for me.  Oh well it will happen...all is good.

What is not good is this battle with insomnia that I have been dealing with.  I have had this issue off & on all my life, even as a child.  I know I am weird. 

Sometimes I can't get to sleep.  My brain just won't slow down enough.  I stare at the clock when I should just get up.  I don't have the best sleep habits and that is something I am working on.



Other times I fall a sleep just fine but I wake a lot and I mean a lot, like every half hour.  I just don't feel rested.  I am not getting good sleep or restful sleep to recharge my body.

I have tried everything but I don't stick with a healthy bedtime habit but even when I do it has not worked for me.

I have tried many different medications both prescription and over-the-counter but I don't like the side effects or the "hangover" effect so I try and avoid them.  I will try them when I feel I am about to lose my mind from not sleeping for several days but only if I don't have to get up early for something.  So that cuts out a lot of the nights.  At this point I am ready to knock myself out for a couple days.

Last Sunday night I did not sleep at all.  I did finally fall asleep around 5 am Monday morning but was pretty much awake by 8:30.  I had to get up and get ready for work that afternoon.  I will admit I cried a lot that morning and my poor husband had to hear all about my woes (he is such a blessing and such a big help--I love him so very much.  He is awesome!). 

I did get up around 2 am and did some journaling and reading.  Here is something I have in my journal:

"What's wrong with me?  Why can't I be a better person?  better wife?  a better mother?

With little to poor sleep I (and I think this is with most people) start to really have doubts about myself and my abilities.  I over think things and I get a wrong perspective on how life is and how I am handling it.  Nobody is perfect and I will be the first to admit that I am not. 

As I was reading my devotion this morning I was reminded of God's love for me.  God loves me for me and not what I do.  He does not love me just when I keep my house clean, laundry done, cooking or even serving all the time.  His love is unconditional.  Yes, we are to go and do God's work but His love and grace is not based on our works.  This I am so very thankful for.  I did just sit and thank God for His love for me this morning.  How awesome is that and so wonderful to think about.  Even when I mess up, God is there and He is not going to leave me.  Now I can work to change my perspective.

"What is wrong with me?"  I am a sinner saved by grace.  So there is nothing wrong (except being human).

"Why can't I be a better person?"  I can through my faith in Jesus Christ and my cont. growth in Him.  I am not a bad person.  Reading God's Word and spending time with Him will just help me see that I am exactly the person God created me to be--flaws and all.

"better wife?  a better mother?"  Again growing in my faith and reading God's Word will help me in these areas.  If you ask my husband I think he will tell you I am a good wife--not perfect but perfect for him.  I am not a perfect mother but I am the perfect mother for my kids. 

God blessed me with the most wonderful husband and 4 wonderful children. 

I will close with this.  I am praying for a great night sleep--I need it bad.  I am seeking God to help me keep my eyes on Him so that I don't lose focus on myself and this life He has blessed me with.  And I pull this verse again to help me get through these tough days until I do get some good rest:

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Matthew 11:28-30

Lord, I need rest.  I am so tired and worn-out.  I pray I will sleep well at night.  I ask for more energy during the day and a more vibrant spirit.  Lighten my load so I can have a better balance among my work, my ministry and my home life.  Replenish me, Lord.  As I unwind in spirit and body, please fill me with peace and rest.  Prayer taken from Prayers with Purpose for Women.

Home from Haiti

I am home from Haiti and already miss being there.  It is good to be home and especially be with my husband but the time in Haiti was amazing.  I did well flying...most of the time.  I had a great team and they were all a big help to make sure I had a window seat and that someone from the team was next to me.  I was thankful to God for putting a remarkable team together and so very thankful that He chose me to be a part of that team.

There were 8 of us from our church and we went out in 2 teams.  One went to work on helping the Haitians build houses and the other (which I was with) went out to be with the kids and do VBS stuff with them.

We rode in what was called a Tap-Tap.  A truck with benches in the back.  Our driver was awesome with all the traffic.

This one is loaded with our stuff for the day.  We then added about 6 people--it got crowded but it was fun.

The first day we were near the guys building but we were at a tent church and had over 100 kids--it was so much fun.  It was very hot in that tent but loving those kids was so very easy.  Some tried to teach me Creole which is their language.  I have a hard enough time with English so this was more laughing than anything.  I really enjoyed it.

The electricity was spotty and it was hard to regulate the temp. at night so the first night us 3 ladies froze.  We shared a really nice room.  I think we all felt a bit spoiled where we were.  Having someone cook for us all week was wonderful.  The food was great but I didn't always know what I was eating.  On Monday I ate a bit too much and ended up sick during the night.  This was not fun but I still thanked God for getting me through it and for sending me to Haiti.  I had to stay back as my team headed out on Tues. and that was hard but I had to get my energy back and rest up.  With no TV or Internet it was a great time of resting and prayer.  I spent the day with God and that is something I don't do here.  I have many distractions so it is easy to do other things but when I was in the compound with no one that spoke English it was a time for me to just be with God.  He has a plan for everything and maybe that was something He wanted from me--to trust, surrender and just spend a day with Him.

The rest of the week went well.  I did lose about 3 lbs from being sick and then cautious about what I ate.  I felt good though.

We spent Wed. going to pick up 2 teachers from one of the orphanages and take them to buy books.  That was a lot of fun.  They were so excited and thankful to have books for the kids.

We all spent Thurs at the orphanage.  The construction team was building new, safe benches for the kids to sit on and we were playing and loving on the kids.  It was so easy to get attacked to them and I look at the pictures and miss them so much.  They loved to wear my hat and sunglasses.  Run their fingers up my veins on my arm and play with my hair.  I had my hair braided many times since it is to fine to hold the braid.  Oh and they loved to take pictures and have their picture taken.  They knew my camera was in my right pocket and would point and say "photo".  So about 50 of my around 400 pictures were taken by kids.

Friday 3 of the construction guys went back to work more on things at the orphanage while the rest of us took a trip up to the mountain.  We went to the Baptist Mission which was really neat to see.  We went to an overlook to see out over Port-au-Prince.  That was just amazing.  Haiti is a beautiful country with beautiful people.

I fell in love with the country and the people. I feel so blessed to have been called to go.

Saturday 3 of the guys helped with some things that needed done around the compound while the rest of us went to a school that had not had a mission team come in before.  We had about 60 kids and did skits and things with them.  It was so much fun and several came forward to receive Christ--that was amazing.  As we were leaving I was hugging one of the young boys and he asked me to pray for him.  He gave me his name and I have been since.  I don't know exactly his need but God does.

We also had a pizza party for the staff that evening.  They didn't have to cook for us and it was so much fun to see how excited there were to have pizza.

Well if you kept up with me this far--thanks.  It is so hard to put into words everything and how so very thankful and blessed I feel to have gotten this opportunity.  I do hope to get a chance to go back and next time take my husband.  I know he would love it.

God really took me way outside my comfort zone but I took comfort in trusting Him.  He stretched me way more than I have ever been stretched.  I look forward to see what He has in store for me next--very exciting!!

Buried alive...

Well, just 6 more days and I will either be on my way or in Haiti.  The last 4 weeks went quick and have been very busy. 

I feel I am sinking or maybe just have tunnel vision.  I am completely focused on this trip.  Packing and re-packing to keep the weight down--not easy when going for a week in a Country like Haiti. 

I over pack and now I am working to cut out things I don't think I will need--again NOT easy.  I have never been there, not sure what all I might need/want.  I don't want to take things that will weigh me down that I don't need but I also don't want to forget something important.

I have to take the time to remember to eat--for me that is bad, I have got to eat.  I have been running almost non-stop for a while now and I am ready to slow down. 

I still have things to prepare for our trip.  Things to do with the kids--FUN!!

I am very thankful to my husband for being so supportive and helpful.  I have been asking my son lots of air travel questions and having him help me weigh my suitcase...over and over and over...in hopes to get it under 45 lbs.  I have asked my mom many questions and have her making me something--that I may not take depending on room.  I have called the airline and asked questions.  I have called the airport and TSA--yep I am that CRAZY!!  I just want to make sure I do everything right.

I hope to have some great stories to tell when I get back and maybe a picture or two to share.  I keep telling myself that the flights are part of this adventure and to just sit back and enjoy them.  Some times it works and other times not so much but I am working to think positive and I know there are many that are praying for me and my team--THANKS AND KEEP UP THE PRAYERS!!

I told my husband that when I get back I am going to sit on our new couch (which has yet to come in) and just watch TV and do NOTHING for a week.  He said that is exactly what he wants me to do.  What a great guy I have!!

OK, back to work since I am done with lunch.  Please keep up those prayers...

Welcome 2011...

OK so I am a few days late but what's new.  Hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas and a great start to the New Year.  I know I have. 

With the new year comes changes.  A lot of people make new years resolutions...I don't.  I just have pretty much the same goals year after year---survive!!  OK, I have more than that but they are pretty much the same.  Does that mean I will never get it right?  Do I need to rethink how I think?  Do I need to change my goals?  Or do I just think to much?  (my guess is the last one)

I did a LOT of changing in 2010.  I started a job after being a stay-at-home mom for a long time.  That was a BIG change for me and a tough one.  I have no regrets taking that job since it taught me so much about myself and helped me to see a few things more clearly.

Today I turned in my 2 week notice to resign from my current job.  It was not easy but it was something I needed to do.  I was very thankful to my manager for taking a chance with me and she was very understanding.  I told her I believe it was a God thing that I got the job and that I had learned so much.  She agreed which was nice to hear. 

Twelve hour days were just not a good fit for me and that is hard.  It makes me feel old and I am not.  When I told my manager that she said they lose a lot of people due to 12 hour days.  I have to say if you work 12 hour days then you know what I mean...they feel more like 20 hour days.

So what is next you may ask (or maybe you don't really want to know but you have read this far and figure you might as well keep going).  I am starting a new job next week.  Two days a week.  No weekends or holidays.  No 12 hour days.  Same 2 days every week so it will make it easier to plan.  I am very excited and a little nervous but more excited.  Plus it is closer to home.  I still have one more day to work at my other job and that is next week also.  It will be a busy week.

So that is how 2011 has started for me and if feels good.
(except for the cold I have) 

I hope your 2011 is off to a GREAT start!!

Giving Thanks

I know Thanksgiving was last week BUT we are to always give thanks in ALL circumstances.  This is not always easy to do but after working Thanksgiving day and having 2 family Thanksgiving gatherings I know I have a lot to be thankful for.

So better late than never--right!

I am very thankful for my family & friends!!  Well that wasn't to hard now was it. 

OK, to make it a bit more challenging and to make you and I think more on what we are thankful for I received an email from Tommy Newberry the writer of The 4:8 Principle I have mentioned before on this very thing.  You can get to it by this link http://www.tommynewberry.com/index.php/blog.  Read about Genuine Gratitude or just go towards the end and click on the link to the GRATITUDE GAME.  There are 12 questions to make you think about what you are thankful for.  For me some were very easy and others were a bit more difficult. 

Even when life is tough there is always something to be thankful for.  I recently had a devotion that was saying we are to be thankful in ALL cirumstances--that means good and bad.  WOW that is not easy, at least not for me.  I mean I can find things to be thankful for but to be thankful for what I am going through--Not easy and honestly I am not good at that.  I can look back and see how God really worked on me during those tough times and then be thankful for the "fire" I was under but not good at is during the "fire".

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."  Romans 8:28

That doesn't mean that all things will be good.  It means that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him--big difference.

It would be nice if we all had easy sailing through this life but we don't.  We are put through the fire for a reason and that is to refine us to be more like Jesus.

"I will put this third through the fire; I will refine them as silver is refined and test them as gold is tested.  They will call on My name, and I will answer them.  I will say: They are My people, and they will say: The LORD is our God." Zechariah 13:9

I am sure many have had this email (poem) come around but I thought I would share it here:

Malachi 3:3

“And He shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver…”


This verse puzzled some women in a Bible study and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God.
One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.
That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining Silver.
As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities.
The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot; then she thought again about the verse that says:
“And He shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver…”
She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time.


The man answered that yes,


He not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.


The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, 'How do you know when the silver is fully refined?'


He smiled at her and answered,


'Oh, that's easy -- when I see my image in it.'


If today you are feeling the heat of the fire , remember that God has his eye on you and will keep watching you until He sees His image in you.

Well, I am not sure how I got from Thankfulness to this but somehow I did.  Maybe because I feel I have been in that "fire" lately and it is very reassuring that God has his eye on me at ALL times to make sure I am not destroyed (even though sometimes it feels like I will be).  He is there to refine me and make me more like Jesus--for this I am VERY THANKFUL!!

So today just take a moment and think about what you are thankful for right now.  I would also challenge you to start your mornings with a few things you are thankful for before you even get out of bed.  Then at night as you go to bed before you fall asleep list off a few things you are thankful for.  Before long you will feel more graditude for the things in life.  That is a good feeling.

God Bless!!

The Ups and Downs of Life

It has been a couple weeks since I have posted and there is good reason...I have been busy and a bit stressed over a few things.  That is no reason but that is the fact.

The DOWNS in life I have, unfortunately, let get the best of me, at least at times.  More times than not to tell the truth.  This is something I don't like about myself and am working to change but it is NOT easy.

A couple weeks ago my husband was doing his devotion and said he really wanted to memorize a passage he just read.  I have been working, wanting, thinking about memorizing scripture lately.  I am not consistent with it but want to try a verse a week.  I told him I would memorize it with him.  I read the first verse a couple times got frustrated and gave up.  I need to just take one verse over a week or even 2 weeks instead of working on several verses at one time.  I was feeling so overwhelmed so I gave up and have YET to start again with another verse.  THIS IS ONE OF MY GOALS!!

I have set myself some goals.  Recently I was thinking about how I want to make sure I am a godly wife, good housewife, mom, friend, daughter, etc...  PLUS I want to do my best at my job.  So I have been praying for balance and direction in these areas.  Sometimes we don't always get the answers we want but once we think about it we realize that is exactly what was needed.

For example, I have been a volunteer for the last 2 years at the children's hospital I now work at.  Since I started my job I have only been able to get in to volunteer once I think.  My schedule is now where I could go in a bit more regular and I was very excited to be able to do that again.  Last week I got an email from my volunteer supervisor saying I can no longer volunteer in patient care areas.  WHAT???  I was so sad and hurt by this and the way she put it in the email it did not make sense to me (well it made sense but not WHY I couldn't volunteer anymore).  I cried over this and then had to keep going since I was to work the next day.  While in the shower it occurred to me that maybe this was a God thing.  Maybe this was God's way of answering my prayers.  I was not going to let it go so He took it from me.  I had done my part and now it was time to move on.  I am still sad about it but after thinking through it and then talking to my supervisor it all makes sense to me now.  With that no longer an option I now have more time to work on being a better housewife & do my best on my job.

After my shower I was ready for bed and sat down to read an online devotional I get and what was it all about...doing too much as women so we don't have to deal with LIFE!  Either we are living in chaos with a frazzled life or so stressed trying to control every aspect of our lives.  Of course this is not all women but it sure hit home with me that night.

The author of the devotion advised us to sit quietly with God.  Relax in His presence.  Being still with God is not always easy to do.  Our minds race with ALL the things we have to do.  God knows everything we have to do there are NO surprises to Him.  This is reassuring to me.  We need to let go of our fears, worries and doubts and just make room for God.

So I took a look at my calendar and started to "plan".  My schedule changes but I do know I work 2 days a week and every 3rd weekend so job...check.  I want to do better with my chores and since my work schedule changes I can't really say I will do this or that every Sat. so I made out a chart and will plan a week at a time so chores...check.  I have TIME WITH GOD at the very top, first thing in the morning on my weekly schedule, so quiet time with God...check.  I have to make sure I have some down time and time with my husband everyday so...check/check.  I feel like I am starting to be able to put things together.  I do know that plans change so I am going to make sure I stay flexible.

Since reading that devotion I have been working on the verse that she started with:

"Since you are my rock and my fortress, for the sake of your name lead and guide me"  Psalm 31:3

I have more stresses that have been getting to me.  The monthly devotional I use I could not get so I went to the Christian book store and found a Beth Moore devotional on David.  Cool, this will keep me going for a while and it looks really good so I will have to let you know how it is.  It is called A Heart Like His.  I plan to start that in the morning.  I also have to go to work and self schedule--pick the days I want to work not including my weekends.  There are rules and I am just hoping I can get there and NOT have to work the days I don't want to.  I am pretty flexible I just have 3 days I don't want to work on that schedule so we will see.  I have been really working to trust God in all this since I have seen Him work out my schedule this whole time so why would He stop now.  Doesn't mean it will be just what I want but I know it will be OK no matter what.

So that has been my life lately and I guess I didn't really put any UP's in there but there are several ups to be happy about and I am still working on being positive although that is not always easy.  I am very thankful to have a wonderful husband, great kids, great friends, wonderful church, great family, great job.........so, so many things to be thankful for so there are quite a few UP's in my life.  I just have to make sure I keep looking at them and not the downs.

Sunrise

I just thought I would share a couple pictures I have taken over the last week.  It is one of the great things of getting up so early and leaving for work.  I leave for work around 6 a.m. and I would see the sunrise and just be in awe of the beauty.  I pulled over to take the pictures out my passenger window so they are not the best but not to bad either.  I LOVE to see the sunrise & sunsets.

July 4th....

...is Independence Day & the day I gave birth to my first child.  So as everyone has picnics & lights up the skies with fireworks I think back to the day my beautiful baby girl was born.  I am so thankful for our freedom in the USA and I am proud to be an American but the 4th of July will ALWAYS be my oldest baby's birthday.  I am very BLESSED & THANKFUL God allowed me to be her mom.