Gone....

The nest is now empty as we got to watch the last 2 fly from the nest and hear mama calling them and they calling back.  WOW that was fast!!  Time to let go.

As a mama of 4 little (well grown) birdies myself this has been a wonderful but somewhat bittersweet experience.  I too have watched as 3 of my 4 birdies have flown the nest.  My one that is home is married and they lead their own life just under our roof for a time.

It is so fun to watch them grow and then to watch as they are young adults flying the nest.  It is also a bit sad to see the empty "nest" or rooms....which I have already filled with my stuff so I guess it didn't take long to grieve. 

Just like the mama bird I am here for my kids.  They can call out to me and I will be there for them.  I am thankful that it took 18 years for my kids to grow and not just the 2 weeks it does for a robin. 

Been Thinking...

Not sure where to start but there have been several things that have happened lately that got me thinking...more than usual. 

I attended a celebration service for a 2 week old that touched so many lives.  It was a special but sad day.  A reminder of how short life is and that we need to not take anything for granted.  This young infants parents are a great testimony to their faith and the love and peace that God pours down on the broken hearted.  God knits us in our mothers womb.  He knows every hair on our heads.  He will never leave us nor forsake us.  This is a love that in beyond words.

I think about how much I love my children and I don't think there is anyone, even their dad, that loves them more than me but I know that God loves them infinitely more than I could even imagine.  WOW!!

One of my kids came to talk to me the other night.  He was not feeling well and we talked about that then ended up talking about his walk with God and where he is in that.  Made my heart sing just listening to him and how he has been growing in his faith and his walk.  I pray for them all daily and I let them know this but to see how God answers in ways that I don't even think about is just awesome to me.

I have felt a bit lazy lately and started thinking that maybe I am not "doing" enough in my walk with Christ.  I have worked the last 2 Sundays and think maybe not being in church has had a bit of an affect on me but not sure.  My husband reminds me that when I go and work that I am "doing" for God what a lot of people can't or won't do.  I am serving sick children, their families & the nurses I work with.  At least that is how I pray as I drive to work and how I feel when I am there.

So what is considered enough for God?  I believe that if our heart is right with God and we are walking in His will then that is enough.  Maybe I don't spend 2 hours in prayer, or read 2 chapters in the Bible everyday.  I do get up every morning and spend time doing a devotion with Bible reading and then have prayer time.  Sometimes this is shorter than others but I do feel it is necessary for me to cont. doing this even if at times I "feel" it is not enough.

I am keeping a positive attitude...most of the time.  I think that for now I am doing what I am suppose to be doing.  I am seeking God and His direction for my life.  I pray for His strength in all I do.  I commit each day to Him.  I do need a little more discipline in some areas in my life.  I am working on those areas.

So if you smell smoke that is just me thinking or over thinking about life, something I am very good at.

F.E.A.R.

FEAR...that is what gripped me just the other day.  I have heard that FEAR is "False Evidence Appearing Real" there are a lot of other acronyms but this one I have heard the most and seemed to fit.  My fear stemmed from a very real concern for one of my children.  Instead of taking that fear to God I just went right into worrying about my child's future and let the worry just keep growing in my mind.

A quote from Corrie Ten Boom I like that really fits here is "Worry is a cycle of inefficient thoughts whirling around a center of fear."

I have been working on NOT worrying and here I was just not letting go of this worry/fear.  Being a mom I want to always protect my kids, this is not possible.  Sometimes the things they go through are for their good.  Personally I don't see the good in this one but only God knows the future.  After some research, more worrying and becoming very grumpy I FINALLY realized I needed to take this child and their issue to God.  It took me a bit to get it through my thick head but I did and it only took me one day--that for me is progress!!  When it comes to my family it takes more work to NOT worry--especially when it has to do with my kids.  I'm still growing...

Now that I was able to give all that to God I am still struggling with myself and the lies that swirl around in my head.  I feel like I have been fighting a battle in my head between lies and truth instead of letting go and letting God have control.  Allowing myself to worry robbed me of an entire day and now I am dealing with the aftermath of thoughts that go with it.  Feelings of failure & guilt.  LIES!!!  I have to take every thought captive, "we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."  2 Corinthians 10:5b.  "Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think."  Ephesians 3:20

I am more content and at peace when I am walking in God's will for my life.  Worry takes me out.  He cannot work in me when I try and take control.  Plus I am no good at it.  I want joy, peace, contentment--things I only have when I keep my eye's on Jesus and walk with Him daily.

"Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God."  Corrie Ten Boom

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
 Philippians 4:6-7

Are you Unbalanced?

Do you feel like you have to many things going on?  Do you feel rushed a lot or frazzled with all of life's demands?  Well I do, at least at times.

This past week I would have a good day then I would feel frazzled about a lot of little things and then a good day then the next frazzled again.  I have been working to balance my life.  This is not easy since there are so many unknowns that come up.  When you are married and have kids it is very hard to stay balanced but not impossible.

I am learning a lot of how to balance my life and part of that is saying NO to things.  This is not easy when I feel pulled in different directions.  I am learning what my priorities are.  I have always known the order--or what I thought was the order:  God, Husband, Kids, Others  That makes sense--right?  Well there seems to be something...or someone missing in that list.  ME!!  It may sound a bit selfish but it is not.  I (we) have to take care of ourselves to be able to take care of others.  I don't mean I am putting ME at the top of others in all circumstances but I have to put me in there somewhere.

Let see where I should put ME......Me, God--no that can't work.  I think it would have to be...God, me, Husband, Kids, Others!!  Yep that works.  Notice that the ME in that list is a little ME.  That is because I feel that we have to put ourselves up there as a priority but for our basic needs (time with God, food, sleep, self care, etc...) not to put ourselves up there so that we are off doing things all the time without thinking of others.  I know when I am well rested, eating good and taking care of myself I have time & energy for just about anything that comes up.  Makes my husband happy to see me taking care of myself and I like to see my husband happy.

Do I think as woman, mothers, wives that we should take time out for ourselves for fun--absolutely!!!  The key here is BALANCE! 

As long as we are spending time with God, taking care of our husbands, kids and ourselves it seems to all fall into place.  I don't know about you but I want to be Supermom but I tried that and my cape burned up in flight.  We can't do it all and we have to make time for ourselves.

For me I think this may be a life long challenge but we will see.  God has really been doing a lot of work in me and I like where He is taking me.  I just have to remember to surrender to Him daily and stay in His will and I will have a joy-filled life.  Will I get frazzled--most likely but I am hoping that those days will become less and less the closer I walk with my Lord.