Being Prepared

I really didn't know how to title this entry but wanted to share a recent experience.  I have been asking God to use me and the gifts that He has given me.  I completely surrendered to His will for my life.  With time on my hands I have been looking for ways to serve (serving is one of my gifts). 

I have been volunteering at a Children's hospital for a couple years and love it but felt like there was more for me.  I am not always patient waiting for God, this is something he is teaching me.  I recently excepted a job but was told I would not be able to start until the middle of June.  OK, I thought this will give me time to prepare for long work days since I have been mostly on "my" schedule for years, now I need to be prepared for a work schedule. 

This past week is where I feel God has really grown me and showed me WHY I had to wait to start this job and a lot of other things.  God has blessed me with the gifts of mercy, serving and encouragement.  I am not always good at following through with them but when I do I am blessed and know I am in His will.  So taking care of others comes easy for me (most of the time--I can be lazy about it).

My mom had been taking care of her oldest brother and he had been pretty sick for some time.  This past week it was evident that my uncle was not going to be around much longer.  I had been praying for him and my mom during this time.  I was on a walk with my husband Tues evening when we were talking about the situation.  My uncle was at a hospital close to me so why was I not going to visit.  I had not grown up with this uncle and he had upset me with the way he had treated my mom so I did kind of "step aside".  While talking with my husband I told him I wanted to be there FOR my mom and to let my uncle know that I loved him.  My husband knew that if I didn't follow my heart, which we both knew it was a prompting from God, that I would regret it.

The next day I go to visit my uncle and planned for a very short visit and again thought this was more to support my mom.  I ended up spending more time there and felt like that was where I needed to be. 

God prepared me and my heart for this time, I have no doubt about that.  I so much loved being there, talking with my uncle, helping him in any way I could and just doing what I know how to do.  He called me his favorite nurse.  No, I am not a nurse, I have a medical background but not a nursing degree.  Taking care of him was easy for me.  I had prayed for his salvation and on Wed. one of the pastors from my church came and talked with my uncle and he prayed and received Christ.  This brought us all a lot of joy.  We would talk about this off and on.  I could see the peace in his eyes.  My uncle went to be with the Lord on Friday 5/21 in the afternoon.  I held his hand as he passed from this life into the arms of Jesus. 

I got up this morning to have my quiet time and one of the devotionals I am using right now was so fitting.  I would have done this yest. but was at the hospital as we had spent the night Thurs. night when he took a turn for the worse.  The book is Praying for Purpose for Women by Katie Brazelton and is a 60 day devotional.  This is what I read this morning:  "Do you understand that he (God) delights in giving you tasks he designed you to love?".  After I read that I sat for awhile just thinking about how God used me & my gifts over the last few days and I was just in awe of the wonderful, mighty God that I serve.  He is so much bigger than my feeble mind can even comprehend. 

I realized that had I been able to start my job earlier I would have started it on the 20th--the day before my uncle passed and I would not have been able to be there and allow God to use me and I would have missed this blessing.  WOW!!!  I thought of how on Thurs I had gotten really tired and had a headache after lunch so I went home to take a nap.  I got a call just after 9 pm that he was not doing well and I headed to the hospital.  I was not tired, I had no headache.  God had prepared me for a long night.  WOW!!!  I had no worries about my family because I knew they were all doing fine and could take care of things at home.  I was right where I was suppose to be at the time.  WOW!!!

I guess I just wanted to try and share just a bit of what I am feeling and how God has been using me.  Words cannot even begin to express how I feel right now and how blessed I feel.  I am just so thankful that I serve a loving God.  I am so NOT perfect, I have so many flaws but God sees me as a clean, pure child of HIS that is willing to be used.  As Samuel said in 1 Samuel 3:10 "Speak, for your servant is listening.".  That is me, not that I always listen but I want to because when I do great things happen.  When I don't.........

So I start my weekend with sadness at the loss of my uncle and joy with how God has used me and the joy in my heart of what an AWESOME GOD WE SERVE!!