I recently had that happen. Of course this is not the first and won't be the last I am sure. Raising 4 kids plans change a lot. Being married plans change a lot. Just being human and having family and friends our plans get changed A LOT. Some people move through these changes with ease and others not so much. Some changes are easier to move through than others no matter the personality. For me I like to see my calendar and I don't like too many changes. I can flow with many of them and then completely stress over others.
This past weekend I was looking at my calendar and was happy to see a relaxed yet a few fun things on the upcoming week. I felt I needed this week to prepare mentally and physically for my upcoming job. That is when "it" hit...I got sick. OK, I was not wanting this but thought it would only last about 24 hours and the rest of my week would be good. It was NOT meant to be.
Monday I was feeling worse and that is when the anger set in. Tuesday it was fear. Wednesday complete frustration. My week was going by and I was not able to do the things I wanted. I was resting but NOT relaxing. Not getting my mind and body ready for my job. Finally to the doctor on Thursday to find out that it is just the residual affects from the "bug" I had Saturday night and that it would most likely last 7-10 days but could possible be more. I had to REST, REST, REST and get LOTS of fluids. At first I cried, this "bug" had ruined my week and possible my upcoming weekend. Will I be ready for my new job on Monday, I wondered. The doctor reassured me that I should be good enough to start my job, just may not feel 100%.
My wonderful husband had been taking care of me and was very positive about the whole thing. At least we knew why I was still feeling so bad and it will end and most likely soon. This is all good news. We can still have fun, just adjust to watching movies and playing games instead of going out on a date. This did shift my attitude as I did see that even though I had plans for this week God used my week differently. My husband reminded me that we were thankful last weekend that it was then and not this coming weekend that the "bug" hit--true. I didn't have anything on my calendar that couldn't be adjusted easily so it has all worked out.
So as I sit on my bed "resting" I think back and I am a bit ashamed of how I reacted. I have asked God to forgive me for not completely trusting Him in all this. I did do a lot of whining and complaining--I think I am good at that.
My "ruined" week was only ruined because of MY attitude toward it. I have grown from this past week. I would prefer to not have gone through all this and hope and pray I don't ever have to again but illnesses happen. I was so stuck on ME and MY plans that I took my eyes off the truth.
"You can make many plans, but the Lord’s purpose will prevail." Proverbs 19:21
My plans & God's plans may not be the same and if I am working and wanting to walk in His will then I need to be prepared for the "hiccups" in my plans that are really the plan's God has for me. Do I think He made me sick--NO. I just think He allowed it to happen for some reason. Maybe to grow me in this. Maybe to remind me to TRUST HIM!! To remind me that He is in control and that is what I want for my life. So I have NO reason to complain now do I.
So next time my plans get changed I hope I will be able to go with the flow knowing that it is all in God's plan and He is in control. For me that is VERY reassuring. I hope it is for you.
“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine." Isaiah 55:8
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